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Author Topic: A Personal Apology  (Read 698 times)

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Offline Shovelhead

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A Personal Apology
« on: August 31, 2017, 10:43:16 PM »
Greetings,
Most of you remember me as a former member named IndianOutlaw. I left on bad terms. Terrible terms actually, just about as bad as you can get. I had lost my home and was in an extremely dark period in my life. I I was taking a massive amount of pills that would make me lash out at anything and anyone. I was a not a good person. Actually, I was the personification of Hell walking on Earth.

I took it out on a lot of people here. People I considered my friends. Especially a guy named Arcadax. For no reason at all. For a reason I was so fucked up at the time, I cant even remember. This apology goes out especially to him.

Being in the state I was is no excuse at all for my actions. There is no excuse for what I did. I accept responsibility for my behavior fully.

With that said, time has passed. I miss this place terribly. I had a lot of amazing and fun times here. I want to be back here. But I feel I fucked up so badly that this may be denied. I would love to come back and be a part of this place. With that said, the ball is in you guys' court. You can accept my apology and I can return new or tell me to fuck off and I'll hit the road and never be seen again.

Love and Regards,
-Shovelhead

Offline Craigyroo

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Re: A Personal Apology
« Reply #1 on: September 01, 2017, 01:56:17 AM »
Greetings,
Most of you remember me as a former member named IndianOutlaw. I left on bad terms. Terrible terms actually, just about as bad as you can get. I had lost my home and was in an extremely dark period in my life. I I was taking a massive amount of pills that would make me lash out at anything and anyone. I was a not a good person. Actually, I was the personification of Hell walking on Earth.

I took it out on a lot of people here. People I considered my friends. Especially a guy named Arcadax. For no reason at all. For a reason I was so fucked up at the time, I cant even remember. This apology goes out especially to him.

Being in the state I was is no excuse at all for my actions. There is no excuse for what I did. I accept responsibility for my behavior fully.

With that said, time has passed. I miss this place terribly. I had a lot of amazing and fun times here. I want to be back here. But I feel I fucked up so badly that this may be denied. I would love to come back and be a part of this place. With that said, the ball is in you guys' court. You can accept my apology and I can return new or tell me to fuck off and I'll hit the road and never be seen again.

Love and Regards,
-Shovelhead

Good to see you checking in, I also went through a similar experience and took it out on a lot of people around me including on here too, so you won't get any judgement from me.

I always remember you as a likeable, kind and hilarious guy.

Ah man, are you aware that Chris AKA Arcadax sadly passed away? I'm sure he'd be the type to forgive and forget, you just take care of yourself and hope to see you soon , especially when RDR2 finally comes out.
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Offline Shovelhead

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Re: A Personal Apology
« Reply #2 on: September 01, 2017, 07:16:11 AM »
Do what?! Dead?! That is so terrible.  :'(

My God... I feel like the world's biggest piece of shit right now. I am so sorry.

I guess I should have taken my Ma's advice which was, "Always be nice to those you love and care about, because you never know if you'll ever get to see them again"

I know you have love for me Craigster and I do you too, you know that. But I'd like to hear what others have to say first whether I'll decide to stay or go.

My condolences to Chris and his family. I'm honestly stunned right now. 

Offline silebyboy

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Re: A Personal Apology
« Reply #3 on: September 01, 2017, 07:47:53 AM »
Hi Shovelhead

I remember you but you won't remember me. You've never upset me so there's nothing to forgive. Welcome back!

Unfortunately the activity around here is incredibly low, hardly any of the old members ever visit anymore. Wilson and VMB should be along shortly but that's about it I'm afraid. I encourage you to stick around and hopefully, the closer we get to the release of RDR2, other folk will follow.

Offline Shovelhead

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Re: A Personal Apology
« Reply #4 on: September 01, 2017, 12:40:41 PM »
I think I vaguely remember you. It's been years, so I may not. Who knows. I'm almost 30 and my brain ain't what it used to be.

So Hud, Finn, Cast, Valjean, and a bunch of the others are no longer around? That sucks. I hope they come back around.

Thanks guys for the welcome back. I appreciate it. I'm giving this post until Monday. If there is even one person who doesn't want me back around, then I'm sorry, but I'll have to go. I don't want any bad blood or problems.

By the way, here is my social club link for GTAV if anyone wants to check it out:
https://socialclub.rockstargames.com/member/austinb-420

Offline will136

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Re: A Personal Apology
« Reply #5 on: September 01, 2017, 12:42:40 PM »
water under the bridge ... don't think i got caught up in any of that shenanigans back then ... so what's for supper?

oh, by the way, we can do the GTA on PS3 but you might want to up grade to a PS4 before the new Red Dead comes out next year ...

Offline Shovelhead

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Re: A Personal Apology
« Reply #6 on: September 01, 2017, 12:44:31 PM »
water under the bridge ... don't think i got caught up in any of that shenanigans back then ... so what's for supper?

Pinto beans, cornbread, mashed taters, and salmon patties... Come on over! :)

Offline silebyboy

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Re: A Personal Apology
« Reply #7 on: September 01, 2017, 03:49:35 PM »
Shovel, haven't seen any of those guys in a long time. It does indeed suck. Hopefully they'll be back one day.

The day that RDR2 was announced all sorts came crawling out of the woodwork. This place will thrive again one day. Stick around, help make the forums great again.

Offline Alphapug

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Re: A Personal Apology
« Reply #8 on: September 01, 2017, 05:17:11 PM »
There are plenty of old names that are still active players on my friends list, so I'm hopeful they'll pop up as a release date draws near. As far as coming back to the forum there's good news and bad news. Yes it's ok with me, but only if you spend the first month of your time here cosplaying as Jersey Dagmar.

Offline silebyboy

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Re: A Personal Apology
« Reply #9 on: September 01, 2017, 06:29:55 PM »
Jersey Dagmar still visits often, but she mainly uses her Cheese account these days.

Offline Shovelhead

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Re: A Personal Apology
« Reply #10 on: September 02, 2017, 07:43:04 AM »
I read what you guys just said. But Pug-brother... What in the literal fuck is going on in that signature?! It scares me, it makes me uncomfortable, it confuses me, and it makes me laugh all at the same time. Therefore, I fucking love it! (thumbsup2)

Offline Shovelhead

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Re: A Personal Apology
« Reply #11 on: September 05, 2017, 07:55:23 AM »
Sorry for the DP... No one likes to be DP'd. Especially early on a Tuesday morning. "Early Tuesday Morning DP" sounds like a bad time. Or a good time depending on whatever you're into.

Anyways, DP apologies aside... I got no objections, so I'll be joining back into the forums full time once again. I'll throw my hat into a few conversations later on. I have a lot of work to do right now. It's great to be back here, feels like coming home again!  :)

Oh yeah, yes Wilson... I will break down and buy a PS4 eventually. Especially before RDR2 comes out. I just keep thinking about all of those PS3s I went through and it makes me sick to my stomach. I can see a boardroom full of neatly dressed Japanese men looking at a picture of me and saying, "Oh we are reering him in rike fish with RDR2! He a fish on hook now!"

Offline Valjean

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Re: A Personal Apology
« Reply #12 on: September 08, 2017, 02:23:41 PM »
Nice to see you again bro.

Offline Mrs Marston

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Re: A Personal Apology
« Reply #13 on: September 13, 2017, 08:19:28 PM »
Hi Shovelhead!  The name of IndianOutlaw sounds vaguely familiar....but depending on how far back it all happened I might not have been around or very active on here. So I don't really remember what happened regarding your behavior.....hell, I don't remember what I did yesterday! LOL! 

Sounds like it's unanimous anyway.....WELCOME BACK!!!! Hope to see ya around more especially when RDR2 is finally released! And I sincerely hope that things are better for you now! I believe that everyone deserves a second chance! 

Offline Alphapug

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Re: A Personal Apology
« Reply #14 on: September 14, 2017, 12:46:38 PM »
I mean, Roo is still welcome here, even after he revealed his motto to everyone...
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Offline Craigyroo

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Re: A Personal Apology
« Reply #15 on: September 15, 2017, 09:55:04 AM »
I mean, Roo is still welcome here, even after he revealed his motto to everyone...
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Offline Shovelhead

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Re: A Personal Apology
« Reply #16 on: September 20, 2017, 09:30:45 AM »
Hey guys. Thanks again for the welcome back! Sorry I have not been on much. I'm working a lot. 12 hours a day, 5 days a week. Then on my days off, working on motorcycles, which I'm doing today. No sleep in almost 50 hours and 10 cups of coffee and I'm feeling a good, long sleep coming.

I lost my data. Erased game data and deleted all of my friends on my playstation. Luckily, I had my data backed up on a flash drive. But I lost all of my friends. So if you want to add me, please feel free to. I have no idea who I did and did not have on there.

Regards and much love,
-A
« Last Edit: September 30, 2017, 07:32:19 PM by Shovelhead »

Offline Ucah8er

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Re: A Personal Apology
« Reply #17 on: October 29, 2017, 12:14:00 PM »
Welcome back. Pretty hard to forget you :D